1. Letter To Nana

From the recording "FREEHAND"

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My mental lethal
In the booth's where I disarm the brain
Still hurts the most that I can't see you
Just to call your name
I heard your voice the other day
Through all the static
Tears rushin heart thumping
So Sad but so ecstatic
I’m thankin Mandy for it
Cousin I'm forever grateful
Hearin her voice was love
Don't know a way I could thank you
Seven years past since you left
Was fifteen on a slump
A decline at its best
You started barely remembering
Course We still did the visiting
Miss you more as I age
But know you're more than a memory
You're someone who literally
Did the best for her kids
And as a grand
You showed ya grands
So much love for years
Full of hugs and cheers
You taught me how to make breakfast
Break fast on these mornings
Make you proud on the checklist
Aunt Mackie just left us
I know she there wit you
Carried her casket past ya grave
Such a damning view
But heaven’s blessed to have you both
On the attendance sheet
I See your palisade apartment
It really makes me weak
I know this letter overdue
Like all my student loans
I'm still learning how to handle emotions
On my own
Pick up the phone and call your number
Wouldn't make it through the first ring
Thoughts if you were back
Lose you again would be the worst thing
But those calls during the week to plan the weekend
Are so missed
This one was for an album
But I had to flip the script
As of lately I been seein things
Give god what I can't control
To get the clearer scene
And something that you used to tell me never follow people
Just cause the conversation matches
Don't mean minds are equal
Be what you want
And never let nobody tell you different
I feel ya presence even though we have a holy distance
All this to tell you that I love you and I always will
You were piece of me that nothing in this world can fill
But know you want me forward and I'm doing so
Know what I'm chasin is a lot of show and provin though
But thank you so much for guidance and the tenderness
Had to wait seven years to start pennin this
And wit no tears in my eyes
I know you here wit me
As I continue this journey
Knowin you steer with me
I had reach out like I said nana it's been a while
Nick and Jon both had a baby
I'm an uncle now
Happy to say that those children
Give me a different smile
Like the one you one that you would give me
Before I left your home
Before I left your home
Before I left your home
Before I left your home
Got in college
And I still just can’t accept your gone

Irreplaceable hugs
Irreplaceable times
Nana Nana
My nana
Yeah you been on my mind
Wish you’d seen me walk
Heard Mia Jean talk
Watched Tripp go to college
Seen me move off the block
Give us more of your knowledge
I'm a lot more mature
So your words would be vital
You forever my idol
I'm forever endebted
To make you proud
Be successful like you always said I would be since a child
Even back when I was silent
And family thought I was special
But you knew I was waitin to share my words
So it ain't stress you
I'd love the chance to let you meet my nephew
And show you his appetite i promise that he'd impress you
But sadly I have to finish the letter
Won’t get meet ya greats
But they'll know Nana forever
Cause you a major reason
I'm the man I am today
I love you more than life
I hope you write me right away